Showing posts with label anger management. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anger management. Show all posts

Anger Management

Why do you get Angry and How to Manage Anger. Simple yet powerful tips for Anger Mangement.

Anger Management Tip

Dealing with Anger

Dear Friends,

Greetings from Shabbar Suterwala:

Article: Dealing with Anger

I have an Aunty,
My aunty loves eating brinjal,
I hate eating brinjal,
So I hate my Aunty.

What I did is I mixed my aunty with brinjal.
I must understand that my aunty is not brinjal. (lol)

Similarly,

Ganpat is my peon,
Ganpat comes late to office,
I do not like people coming late,
I do not like Ganpat.
I have mixed Ganpat as a person with his -ve quality.

My boss is nagging,
I do not like nagging,
I hate my boss.

Friends, what we do is confuse ourself and mix people and their -ve qualities.

Seperate people from their qualities and love people unconditionally.

Lets work on dealing with the -ve quality.

Also, understand, that by you getting angry, -ve qualities may not always improve.

Why people get angry is they have high expectations from others, high standards of performance and when this does not match, they flare up.

Let me ask you one simple question,

By you getting angry,
"CAN A DONKEY BECOME A HORSE?"

Its sheer IMPOSSIBLE, that a donkey become a horse, yes, your blood pressure may rise, and you may develop ulcers in the process.

Although you can not make a Donkey a Horse, but you can always make a Donkey a Better Donkey. Infact, if you just look at the good and +ve quality of the donkey, and acknowledge it, there are many chances that the donkey will be a "better donkey".

Lets see how we can manage anger, now: Some tips..
Stop REACTING .....! Instead; PAUSE - THINK & then ACT (PROACTIVE)

List five things which make you angry, be specific, then rank them from 1 to 5, using 1 for the one which angers you most.

Next to each one write down the main reason why it makes you angry. (People, Situations, Events basically the Trigger )

Finally, write down next to each one what you do when you are angry in such a situation.

Include your physical responses as well as what you do and say, discuss your list with your partner.

Now find a near and dear one with whom you may sit and work, to see if you can think of an alternative assertive response to each situation, or when ever the

Trigger is pulled.. what can you do instead..

Please do share your feedback of the same...

May your day be filled with inspiration and passion!

Best Regards
Shabbar Suterwala
http://leaders-workshop.blogspot.com/
http://bust-the-stress.blogspot.com/
http://shabbarsuterwala.blogspot.com/
http://training-and-trainers.blogspot.com/

Become a Lake

Dear Friends,

Greetings from Shabbar Suterwala.

Here is a short story to understand the Pain and Gain Principle. Trust this will help us to understand the difference between the two and help us overcome pains in our lives.

Story – Become a Lake

The old Master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it. "How does it taste?" the Master asked. "Terrible," replied the boy.

The Master then asked the young man to take another handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake and when the guy swirled his handful of salt into the lake, the old man said, "Now drink the water from the lake."

As the water dripped down the young man's chin, the Master asked, "How does it taste?" "Good!" remarked the boy. "Do you taste the salt?" asked the Master. "No," said the young man.

The Master sat beside this troubled young man, took his hands, and said," The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the same, exactly the same. But the amount we taste the 'pain' depends on the container we put it into.

So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things.....

What is required is to change our paradigm and make a shift in our focus. Too often we are more focused only on the gain, and miss out on the gain.

Stop being a glass. Become a lake! Failure doesn't mean when we fail, but when we don't want to come up again.

Let us sit down and make a List of all our Pains. Also, let us analyze the containers we have been using and how today we can make a shift and gain from it.

"The greatest aim of Education is not Knowledge but ACTION"

Please do share your feedback on the same.

Thanks and Regards

Shabbar Suterwala